Random Thoughts: Want to bet on Rose’s success?

by Gary Shelton on April 19, 2015 · 0 comments

in general

Sunday, 6 a.m.

Hi. I’m Pete Rose. And now that I’m on TV, you can refer to me as “Pete the Greek.’’

— My first thought when I heard about Aaron Hernandez and the suicide watch? Yes. I’d like to.

— So, the next thing that Advanced Towing will haul away will evidently be Britt McHenry’s career. Here’s a hint: Nice still trumps pretty.

— Wow. Nice muscle by A-Rod. Wonder where he bought it?

— When you win the first draft pick four years in a row like Edmonton, is that a dynasty?

— Just guessing here, but if the Bucs were to earn the top draft pick in four straight years, it would greatly disappoint coach Jimbo Fisher.

— I forget. In the original The Longest Yard, did Burt Reynolds talk to Aaron Hernandez first or Lawrence Phillips?

— William and Mary is removing Darren Sharper from its athletic Hall of Fame. Near as I can tell, that leaves Spud Bloxsom as the go-to member.

— Sign we’re all getting old, I: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar just had heart surgery.

— Can’t wait to hear Rose refer to the hit-and-run as “like filling an inside straight.’’

— I see the Houston Astros broke out the astronaut suits, and I don’t think The Right Stuff.What I think is Hal doesn’t know who’s on first.

— Just think: All of those tight end meetings in New England, and Rob Gronkowski was the sane one.

— I don’t know about you, but when I saw Cristiano Ronaldo in his underwear, the first thing I thought was “thank goodness B.J. Raji doesn’t have twitter.’’

— Any way the Patriots can blame those deflated footballs on Hernandez?

— I sure like Ron Jaworski, but who are these “NFL folk’’ who are his source that the Bucs will draft Marcus Mariota over Jameis Winston. I mean, with whom in the NFL are the Bucs sharing secrets?

— With Ickey Woods announcing the Bengals’ pick at the NFL draft, don’t you wish there was a running back named Oscar Meyer?

— Maybe Jameis Winston wants to pay attention, but the slower contract renegotiations go in Seattle, the more interested Russell Wilson seems in playing baseball.

— Speaking of bullies, I wonder what Richie Incognito thinks about Britt McHenry.

— Can’t wait to hear Rose refer to striking out the side as “hitting a trifecta.’’

— I see on TMZ that a bisexual player is angry at Michael Sam for suggesting he lacks the courage to come out. That’s awful, said the player. His case would have been stronger, of course, if he hadn’t made it anonymously.

— Next time, producer Chris Cameron should just say “Does Ickey Woods like cold cuts?’’ He got in trouble with an email that rhetorically asked “Does Bruce Jenner wants boobs?’’

— This year, Nike had Ray Rice, Adrian Peterson, Johnny Manziel and Oscar Pistorius. They’ve just signed Jameis Winston and Marcus Mariota. Evidently, “Nike’’ is a Greek word meaning “Oops.’’

— I love that Brian Shaw rapped a scouting report to his Denver Nuggets team. Reminds me of the time Red Auerbach worked “23 skidoo’’ into a pregame speech.

—The upset wasn’t that Billy Donovan was mentioned as a possible coach for the Thunder. It’s that he was still rumored for the job after the rumor was finished.

— So who got clipped, exactly? Did you see where V. Stiviano, whose betrayal cost Donald Sterling his Clippers, has been ordered to repay his ex-wife $2.6 million. In other words, Shelly Sterling has just pulled an unassisted double play.

— Sign we’re getting old II: Joe Montana has now been retired 20 years.

— So a guy punches a 78-year-old man at the TCU spring game? Wow. Who knew everyone was on edge with that kind of excitement?

— Not making this up. Maurice Clarett had trouble figuring out the Aaron Hernandez verdict. Of course, Clarett also had problems working a ball-point pen.

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