Hello. I'm Tiger Woods, and I think it would be a great idea if they would make a golf tournament that lasts more than two rounds. What? They have those?
– What? You were expecting microwaved greatness out of Jameis Winston?
– Interesting to see the safeties on the Sports Illustrated all-overrated team, wasn't it? They were Dashon Goldson (now of Washington) and Mark Barron (now of the Rams). Together, they made a lot of money chasing receivers across the goal line for the Bucs.
– Has a player ever had his broken jaw in two places and looked worse than the Giants' Geno Smith? At least Jason Pierre-Paul only held the firecracker. He didn't bite down one it.
– Well, Michael Sam was certainly worth the ink spent on headlines, wasn't he?
– USA Today lists 17 members of the Pro Football Hall of Fame who don't belong, led by ex-Cowboys' quarterback Troy Aikman. Among the others: Paul Hornung, Joe Namath, Bob Griese and Bob Hayes.
– And no matter what you think, Winston doesn't belong yet.
– Does anyone else wonder if Josh Freeman can take Michael Sam's roster spot with the Alouettes?
– Question: What did it mean when Buffalo signed former Jets' knockout artist IK Enemkpali? And why did the Bills tell him that quarterback E.J. Manuel would be in charge of his paycheck?
– I don't know where Steve Yzerman spent his summer vacation, but evidently, they didn't have a phone there. Or a Steven Stamkos.
– Just wondering about Simeon Rice's new film “Unsullied.'' Who knew Rice ever watched films?
– I see that Robert Griffin III's popularity has dwindled almost as fast as Bill Cosby's. Which goes to show you how unwise it is to play a Huxtable kid at quarterback.
– Here are a few reasons the Browns might be interested in Ray Rice; Terrance West rushed six times for 10 yards. Isaiah Crowelll rushed four times for six yards. Compared to that, an offensive, diminishing back doesn't sound all that bad.
– Saints' receiver Brandon Coleman evidently likes to play dress up. He showed up in a Marques Colston jersey and helmet and signed autographs. He was going to go as Julio Jones, but someone might have recognized him.
– First, there was the suspension. Then the personality attacks. Then the broken cell phone. Now, there are rumors that Tom Brady's marriage to Gisele Bundchen is having problems. Sometimes, the good life can vanish into deflated air.
– I think I'm shaken, not stirred. But I just saw the new promo for Arizona football, starring Rich Rodriguez as James Bond. Sorry, but as far as I'm concerned, the problem is For Your Eyes Only.
– An Indianapolis brewery is including a stamp with an offensive message for Tom Brady on its cans. Of course, if Brady had gotten into the brew beforehand and drank about a keg of it, maybe the game would have been closer than 45-3.
It could have been worse. Geno Smith could have owed the money to Ronda Rousey.
Maybe they'll hold the line. Maybe they'll even be better. From a distance, however, the Detroit Lions look as dead as Cecil.
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