Random thoughts: Will Rams get past Jeff Fisher?

by Gary Shelton on December 4, 2016 · 2 comments

in College Sports in Florida, general, NFL, Tampa Bay Bucs

Sunday ,5 a.m.

Hi. I'm Jeff Fisher, coach for life. And next year, we hope to be even better than 7-9, whether we need to be or not.

– Did Alabama score again? I drifted off.

– I was shocked that Tony Dungy endorsed Willie Taggart for the Oregon job. I was thinking he'd pick Les Steckel. Mike Shula? Clyde Christensen?

– Cleveland weatherman Scott Sabol has threatened not to shave until the Browns win a game. Already, he looks like a Confederate war general, as scraggly and homely as the losing streak itself. Nice pandering, Scott.

– People who should be pulling for Chip Kelly to return to Oregon. Every member of the San Francisco 49ers.

– So is Rolando McClain a member of the NFL or not? Discuss.

– Pittsburgh receiver Antonio Brown says to call him “Ronald” from now on. No one knows if it's a tribute to McDonald's, but he also wants to go by “The Hamburglar.”

– Charles Barkley says that the Golden State Warriors play “girly” basketball. Maybe that explains the photo of “Xena – Warrior Princess” on the jerseys.

– Does Art Briles accept that Houston didn't want him as football coach? If Briles' history shows us anything, it's that he doesn't understand that “no means no.”

– Jarran Reed says that Bucs' center Joe Hawley “went crying like a 14-year-old girl” for saying Reed spat in his face. The boxscore? Reed had one solo tackle, two total and zero sacks. Someone's in the wrong game of hopscotch, methinks.

– Going into the weekend, Tiger Woods was the 898th-rated golfer in the world. That means he'd fit just fine in a 900-player bracket.

– I'll miss Vern Lundquist, too, but what's the record for the longest retirement? Eight days? 10?

– There was a Gainesville bar who offered free shots every time Florida scored in the SEC title game. Good thing it wasn't Alabama, or the entire city would be Foster Brooks-ville.

– Just wondering: How much of the appeal of hockey is the relative quickness of the game compared to college football?

– Love the creativity of Browns fans, who have modified the old Kellen Winslow jerseys. After removing the O, they now say Wins 0.

– Every time I hear Raul Castro, and I think he's the backup Castro, only to be used when the real nut-bar isn't available. Which he isn't.

– If you're counting, Florida's basketball team gave up 54 points or less four times last year.

– Eric Dickerson won't attend Rams' games because he doesn't like Jeff Fisher. Why didn't the rest of Los Angeles think of that?

– I'll start watching MMA when Flo fights the Dr. Pepper guy in a cage match.

– NFL.com ran a simulation, and it came out that winless Cleveland would beat undefeated Alabama 93.6 percent of the time. When you think of some of the more notable Alabama busts: Rolando McClain, Dee Milner, Mark Barron and Trent Richardson, it's possible. But not if Robert Griffin III plays quarterback.

– Pop quiz: Which almost-Buc did Tampa Bay have the most luck in avoiding: a) Chip Kelly; b) Jay Cutler; c) Albert Haynesworth.

– Browns' vice president of football operations Sashi Brown says he isn't worried about the team's record. That's like the dumb kids not being worried about a calculus test. And Brown of the Browns? What? Is this like the Ramones?

– The NFL.com ranked the top 10 most disappointing free agents. No, J.R. Sweezy did not make the list. Which means NFL.com probably forgot about him. Like everyone else.

– How much would they have to expand the playoffs to include Lovie Smith's 3-9 Illinois team?

– Bear Bryant? I remember him. Why, he was the second-best coach that Alabama ever had.

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