Random thoughts: Whatever happened to the friendly skies?

by Gary Shelton on April 23, 2017 · 0 comments

in general

Sunday, 4 a.m.

Well. Nice to know that American Airlines is prepared to compete with United for the loss of your money. I'd rather fly with Amelia Earhardt than either one of them. Or Southwest.

– Just wondering: How many fans will think less of Aaron Hernandez for having a boyfriend than they thought of him for being a murderer? Doesn't that say something about our society?

– When Roger Clemens tells the world how innocent he was of PEDs, I just look at his career numbers and wait for someone to call him Pinocchio. That's what steroids do to you: They make acne grow on your shoulders, they make your head swell and they make your nose grow from lying..

– No, LeVar Ball didn't mean Michael Joran. He meant he was too much for Jerome Jordan who averaged 2.8 points in 65 NBA games for the Knicks and Nets.

-- According to NFL.com, here is upcoming Tampa Bay Bucs' draft class: 1. Dalvin Cook, running back; 2. Curtis Samuel, RB-WR, 3. Duke Riley, linebacker, 4.Larry Ogunjobi, defensive tackle, 5. Victor Salanko, tackle, 6. Tedric Thompson, safety; 7. Alex Torgensen, quarterback.

– I tried to take a sample Wonderlic test, just to see if they still asked if a firetruck is red. It wanted me to click on an ad. My thought: “No, I'm not that stupid.”

- Ilie Nastase is quiet for 40 years, so quiet we didn't even know he was still alive, and then he says something stupid. The silence was better.'

– There are a lot of eerie similarities between ex-Ram Lawrence Phillips and ex-Patriot Aaron Hernandez. With both, it boils down to this: You wonder what might have happened with a little more discipline in college.

– According to USA Today's Draftwire.com, here is the upcoming Tampa Bay Bucs' draft class: 1. Dalvin Cook; 2. Adoree' Jackson, cornerback; 3. Carlos Henderson, wide receiver; 4. DeMarcus Walker, defensive end; 5. Xavier Woods, safety; 6. Eric Saubert, tight end; 7. Hardy Nickerson Jr., linebacker.

– No, LeVar Ball doesn't think he could stop Michael Jordan. He meant Jordan Farmar, who averaged 7.7 points per game.

– According to ProFootballFocus.com, here is the upcoming Tampa Bay Bucs draft class: 1. Christian McCaffrey; 2. Cam Robinson; 3. Derek Rivers, defensive end; 4. Josh Jones, safety; 5. Ishmael Zamora, wide receiver; 6. Keith Brown, linebacker; 7. Joey Ivey, defensive line.

– Now that Lane Kiffin has left Alabama, he's left one burning question: Who is getting Nick Saban his coffee?

– Wish I could see through the eyes of the guys at Foxsports.com, who have the Bucs going 13-3 this year, losing  games only to the Vikings, Bills and Panthers. That means wins over the Patriots, Falcons (twice), Packers, Cardinals and Giants.

Jimmy Haslam wants the Browns to draft a quarterback first, reports say. This is the same guy who drafted Johnny Manziel because a homeless guy told him, too. Another pick like Manziel, and a lot of people with this franchise are going to be homeless.

According to CBSsports.com, here is the upcoming Tampa Bay Bucs draft closs: 1. Obi Melifonwu, safety; 2. tight end Adam Sheheane; 3. Curtis Samuel, RB-WR; 3. (trade) Wayne Gallman, running back; 4. Shaquill Griffin, cornerback; 5. Kyle Fuller, center. 6. Jayon Brown, outside linebacker; 7. Alex Torgenson, quarterback.

DeShone Kizer says he has the brain of Tom Brady and the body of Cam Newton. I guess that beats the truth, in which he has the brain of Ryan Leaf and the body of JaMarcus Russell.

No, LaVar Ball doesn't seriously think he could hang with Michael Jordan.That's just silly. He meant he could hange with Jordan Hamilton, who averaged 5.9 points in six NBA seasons.

The Rangers let go of former Rays' phenom Josh Hamilton, who has played only 147 games since 2014. No, I can't see him finishing up here. Not unless he can be 18 again.

Were you impressed with Joe Montana in the two-minute drill? How about this? Ben Ketola of Preble, New York, rolled a 300 game in bowling in 86.9 seconds. You know, about the time it takes you to put on your rented shoes.

– Ashton Eaton wants to go to Mars. That would give him the second oddest journey by a former decathlete. No one is going to catch Caitlyn Jenner.

-- According to Foxsports.com, here is the upcoming Tampa Bay Bucs' draft class. 1. Cam Robinson, tackle, 2. Justin Evans, safety (one spot ahead of Dalvin Cook; 3. Bucky Hodges, tight end; 4. Kareem Hunt, running back; 5. Garrett Sickels, defensive end; 6. J.J. Dielman, guard, 7. Des Lawrence, cornerback.

– We all love a good conspiracy theory, but you've really got to stretch it in the case of Aaron Herandez, who was alone in a locked cell when his body was discovered with the door jammed so it wouldn't open. So, was it prisoners or prison officials? Or spacemen?

– Now that Bart Simpson is turning 30, isn't it time we admit that Mr. Burns is really Bill Belichick?

– No, Tiger Woods isn't back. Instead, the news is that Woods has a terrible back. He just had his fourth operation on it, which increases the odds of him never winning again.

– According to Walterfootball.com, here is the upcoming Tampa Bay Bucs' draft class:1. Dalvin Cook, running back; 2. Josh Jones, safety; 3. Tarrell Basham, defensive end; 4. Jalen Myrick, cornerback; Jehu Chesson, wide receiver; 5. 6. Jerod Evans, quarterback; 7. (the website fell asleep before round seven).

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