Random Thoughts: Sleeping through the season

by Gary Shelton on February 26, 2017 · 0 comments

in general

The reason two USF basketball players fell asleep and missed their flights? Maybe they were watching gamefilm of USF basketball.

– Keyshawn Johnson says Dan LeBatard is a racist for questioning Magic Johnson's ability to run the Lakers. I think maybe Johnson needs a dictionary. You can criticize – right or wrong – without it having anything to do with Johnson's race.

– It's nice that Baker Mayfield is returning to Oklahoma and all. But the last guy to sack him was a police officer, which makes you wonder if Barry Switzer is in charge again.

– Tommy Tuberville wants to be governor of Alabama? Be careful, Tommy. No time-outs in politics.

– On the other hand, who wouldn't want to continue in the footsteps of George Wallace?

– Just wondering: How long before NFL jerseys have as many sponsorship patches as NASCAR drivers?

– Don't you love it when the big guys whine in each other's direction: Kevin Durant says that Shaq O'Neal missed dunks, air-balled free throws and couldn't shoot outside the paint. He was bigger than anyone else but had no skills. Shaq's response is that he wasn't ripping Durant, he was ripping teammate JaVale McGee. Which is a lame way of saying “Oh, yeah?”

– Since Ronda Rousey seems to have a blind spot (in front of her face), TV producers felt she should be a guest star. What's next? The Walking Dead?

– Vince Young has applied for the trademark of “Make Vince Great Again.” To do that, he's going to have to go back to Texas, and we're going to have to gather all those lost USC defensive players back from the used car lot.

– Does DeMarcus Cousins think he was the first player ever traded?

– I read where Aaron Hernandez may blame his violent acts on marijuana. Please. If it was weed that made you kill, Cheech and Chong would be the Menendez Brothers.

– The Bears supposedly are trying to trade quarterback Jay Cutler. So if you're an NFL team and you have a spare backup long snapper around, you can pick up Cutler. You might want to ask for an extra draft pick, too.

– I wonder if Brent Grimes ever wanted to use Jameis Winston's advice to females on his wife.

– Mike Tyson is selling his Ferrari for $2.4 million. No word on if it will be filled up with gas.

– How much does playing in the NFL cost a guy? Consider Cedric Benson, who told police in a sobriety test that he was unable to recite the alphabet “from G through T” or unable to count to three. Fortunately for him, the policemen were former coaches and said that was “most of them.”

– Marshawn Lynch is angry at Netflix because it has a new show called “Ultimate Beastmaster.” Suddenly, the guy won't shut up.

– Sometimes, you don't want to be defended by everyone. Jumping to Jameis Winston's defense is porn star Mia Khalifa. Um, no thanks, Mia. I'll take the heat.

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