Random Thoughts: Was Elder’s play the best ever?

by Gary Shelton on November 1, 2015 · 0 comments

in general

Hi, I'm Gary Tyrrell, former member of the Stanford band. And I think Miami's kickoff return was the best play in the history of college football in which I did not get run over. Thank you.

– Still, a nine-minute review?

– Did the Redskins just score again?

– If it was me, I'd start Sean Maguire. Just saying.

– It isn't that Colin Kaepernick wears his headphones too much. It's that he listens to Barry Manilow, and they leak.

– I'm not impressed with all this tough-guy stuff, but if Noah Syndergaard really wants to fight with the Royals, could a matchmaker please fix him up with Jonny Gomes? That's pay-per-view stuff.

– Don't you wish, just once, that someone would accuse the Bucs of doing something illegal to get an edge? Of course, that would hint that they had an edge, wouldn't it?

– Tim Tebow went as a SWAT officer for Halloween. Evidently, they were all out of Tom Brady jerseys.

– Marc Richt is a nice guy, and he's good for college football. But has anyone ever tapped less potential from his roster? And is the Florida game the best time for a third-string quarterback?

– If the Lightning slump gets any worse, I'm going to start looking for Tiger Woods on the wing.

– Green Bay's Eddie Lacy denies that he's overweight. So what if they've changed the team nickname to the Porkers.

– How to make Halloween really scary: Remake the Addams Family, but use Jason Pierre-Paul's hand as Thing.

– The Texans will let Ryan Mallett know he's cut as soon as he shows up for meetings.

– Wouldn't it be cool if Aaron Hernandez dressed up like O.J. Simpson for Halloween?

– The Bucs beat the Patriots! Well, sort of. In USA Today's ranking of helmets, the Bucs were 31st in the NFL. The Patriots were 32nd.

– Wouldn't it be cool if Caitlyn Jenner went to a Halloween party as Renee Richards?

– If Charles Manson played for the Cowboys, would Jerry Jones praise his passion?

– Is there a Tiger Woods version of the Operation game?

– Okay, someone has to ask: Has Jimbo Fisher been playing the wrong quarterback at FSU all along.

– I TOLD Ryan Mallett not to buy that watch from Josh Freeman.

– Wouldn't it be cool if Lovie Smith dressed up for Halloween as Greg Schiano?

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