Random Thoughts: Does Golden have a chance?

by Gary Shelton on October 25, 2015 · 0 comments

in College Sports in Florida, Miami, NFL

Sunday, 6 a.m.

Hi. I'm Al Golden, and what pressure? A lot of Miami alumni want to adjust my necktie. One even bought me this one that looks ... like a rope. Ack.

– Now Nick Saban wants Alabama fans to be more like Texas A&M. So they can't buy the dress they want, and now they have to be like Aggies? Does that mean they should all buy Johnny Manziel a drink?

– Tom Brady says he has another decade in him. That would make Tom Terrific 48, or in playing-for-Bill-Belichick years, 106.

– The NFC East is now ranked third in the NFL (by USA Today). I imagine it was the Bucs' second win that put it over the top.

– Memo to Doug Martin. A guy doesn't get to pick his own nickname. Signed Bugsy Siegal.

– How much does it cost to win? Let's see: Joe Maddon got $43 million dollars more on his payroll and won 17 more regular season games.

– I saw that a couple got married at a tailgate at the Alabama game. The man who officiated it wore a hat like the pope's. A man in a Speedo was a witness. The bride wore boots. No word how the possum was prepared.

– Judging from Warren Sapp's criticism of him, Al Golden's hookers are on him.

– According to USA Today, Lovie Smith is the 21st best coach in the league. Jay Gruden, today's opponent, is 30th.

– London fans want the NFL in the worst way. They must. Of the 14 games that have been played in Jolly Old England, there will be as many as 12 teams (counting next week's game between the Lions and Chiefs who have one win or less. Call it revenge for Boy George.

– Tiger Woods says his return to golf will be “long and tedious.'' In other words, it will be much like the last eight years of his career.

– I say the Cubs and Blue Jays play a runner-up series. Just for fun.

– Darrelle Revis returns to New England today. Turns out, he left a dollar in his locker.

– Come to think of it, Sapp would be a great next coach for Miami. I don't know if he would win, but the post-game pressers would be fun. Next question?

– I've said this before, but with the Bucs playing the Redskins today, it bears repeating. I think it was crazy that the first of the Hogettes suggested that they all wear dresses. I find it crazier that the other guys said, “Yeah, that's a good idea.''

– Of course, with those guys, you might as well change the controversial nickname to the “Leopard Skins.” Just saying.

– Somewhere, the guys who brought you Arena Football are thinking up something else. Start with the three-on-three overtime. Somewhere, I'm sure there is a grumpy old guy pointing out that Gordie Howe didn't play this when TVs came in black-and-white, but I think it's sheer electricity.

– I'm sorry he may have his motor skills diminished, but why do people have different reactions for Lamar Odom and Suzy Favor Hamilton?

– I love how the folks in the Ukraine changed that statue of Vladimir Lennon to be Darth Vader. Is there any way we could make the one of Joe Paterno into Boba Fett?

– When, exactly, did Bill Cosby have time to buy all those Pudding Pops?

– The Bucs' current winning streak matches their longest for the last two seasons: One in a row.

– Glamour Magazine has decided on its Woman of the Year. It's Caitlyn Jenner. I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do with publicity that a father was named Woman of the Year.

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